Sonia Marsh - Gutsy Living

Life's too short to play it safe

“My Gutsy Story” by Cheryl Stahle

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Just Another Religious Festival

“OK”.  And with that one word, my 15 year marriage ended.  We had both given up so there were no fights or last hurrahs to save our union.  I wanted our son.  Done.  He wanted his pension.  OK.  We actually negotiated the division of property at Starbucks over lattes.  Dutch treat!

It doesn’t get any better than that for a friendly divorce.

However, I had spent the previous 15 years as an ice hockey mom and school teacher for at-risk teens.  For this 70s throwback of peace, love, rock and roll, violence didn’t fit with my belief system; however, circumstances dropped it into my lap daily both at home and at school.  Along the way I disappeared while serving the needs of everyone else.  I couldn’t even remember what I enjoyed doing and I didn’t know where to start in creating Cheryl Version 2.0, middle aged edition.

Slowly I experienced rebirth, dabbled in online dating (just don’t!), raised an amazing son and developed deep interests in yoga, reading and writing. My regular haunts included Starbucks, yoga studios and bookstores.  Not exactly the life of a thrill-seeker but joy appeared in subtle ways through the perfect backbend or a well written novel devoured over a latte and cookie.   I was restless though.  After so many years living in ice rinks and never taking a vacation I had to blow off some steam and this lovely life I had created did not include adventure.

Three weeks.  That became my gift of time and for once in my adult life, I had freedom.  Throw caution to the wind, this was a childless adventure.  My friends thought I’d head to the shore with a stack of books when I shared the news of a getaway.  Not this time.

The Festival of San Fermin!  That’s where I chose to go so I planned a vacation around that religious holiday.  Traveling to the major cities of Spain introduced me to centuries old neighborhoods, gothic cathedrals, and fabulous museums.  I soaked it all in while spending siesta time sitting in plazas drinking cava.  Three weeks.  Time for me.  And for kicks, I went alone and did not activate international cell phone service.   No one to tell me when to get up, what to eat for dinner, or how to spend the days.

I enjoyed 2 glorious weeks traveling throughout Spain with my camera in hand.  I wandered through street markets, toured museums and palaces and chose to view only masterpieces at the Prado.  I even crashed a wedding reception.  Why not?  No one really knew what I was doing but me.  I enjoyed freedom for the first time.

Did I mention that the Festival of San Fermin is more commonly called the Running of the Bulls in Pamplona?   I didn’t tell too many people from home either.  I certainly didn’t tell my mother what adventure awaited me.  My guess was that wouldn’t go over too well.

The bulls in Pamplona

A train ride later, I entered the tiny village of Pamplona.  The annual kickoff food fight had fortunately already ended by the time I settled into my hotel but the partying had just begun.  I began to realize that my standard glass of wine was not going to be the norm for the next few days.

Mardi Gras looked tame compared to Pamplona during the festival.  Dressed in obligatory whites with red sash and scarf, I elbowed my way through the crowds to enter the streets.  Once there, African conga drums played, strangers pulled me into their arms to dance in the street and mimes entertained all.  Music poured forth from stores and vendors filled the streets selling t-shirts and flags. The streets provided sensory overload but once I got into a rhythm, the crowds became invisible.   Callemucho .  The drink of San Fermin poured freely usually by flask or 2 gallon jug.

Cheryl Stahl in Pamplona

After a night of partying and no sleep, the actual festival began.  Fueled with over a decade of pent up energy, I  chanted “let ‘em loose”  in my mind.  Catch me if you can.  But I’m not quite as foolhardy as it appears.

First, most of the people running had imbibed for at least 24 hours.  I chose to toss back just one flask of Callemucho (cheap wine and soda).  Juts for courage I thought but my balance remained rock solid.  Next, a plan.  I wasn’t about to run on a cobblestone street the width of a standard American alley full of drunks without knowing the lay of the land.  I watched the first day, safely ensconced on a balcony two stories above bull level.

Day 2 however I joined the crowd in the street.  My earlier reconnaissance showed that the end of the run was safer as there were fewer people (still packed shoulder to shoulder), a bit more space on the street and a fence to leap over should the need arise.  So that’s where I planned the start of my run.

I heard the shot indicating that the bulls had left their pens, waited my 17 seconds for them to arrive, and then hit the street.  There they were, 10 agitated, magnificent 2000 pound beasts and me soaking wet at 115 pounds.  This sister ran fast, smelled their musky odor as they swept by and breathed a sigh of relief as I choked on their dust when they roared past.  My 2 seconds of glory.  Not trampled, not hurt and only a slight glow of perspiration on my brow.   I ran with the bulls.  Feel my power now people!

This single mom can do anything these days.   When life gets tough or when I’m feeling a bit beaten up, I don my red sash from Pamplona, look at the photos I took of the bulls on my desk and smile.  I found my inner courage again.  I’m getting to know myself too.  Life’s not so bad as Version 2.0.

 

Cheryl Stahle, memoirist, author and founder ofYour Best Writing Group (www.yourbestwritinggroup.com) lives in Doylestown, PA with her son.  Cheryl consults with aspiring authors to guide them in telling their life stories.  She has a special interest in working with adoptive families as an adoptive parent herself.

*****

Thank you Cheryl for giving women the courage to do something so unique and spectacular for themselves. I am a firm believer that when you get out of your comfort zone, you get that special feeling that you can accomplish anything in your life and you are a perfect example of this.

*****

Do you have a “My Gutsy Story”?

To submit your own, “My Gutsy Story” you can find all the information, and our sponsors on the “My Gutsy Story” contest page. (NEW VIDEO) Submission guidelines here.

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Jill Fales, winner of our first “My Gutsy Story” contest, picked the following prize:

  • Spectrum Specialties and Awards just joined on 11/2/11 with a wonderful prize: 1000 14pt business cards with UV coating, full color process, & double sided print. I am so thrilled as I know they do quality work.

Rhonda Hayes, came in second. Since she was the first to submit her story and since this was the first contest, she also won a prize and selected a chapter critique from Angela Ackerman..

  • Angela Ackerman offered two choices: a first chapter critique or a blog consultation offering her expertise on your blog layout, content, etc and offer advice on tweaking it to improve, draw in visitors, increase visibility, etc. Winner can choose which would benefit them more. Angela and Becca have put together the most helpful blog for writers called The Bookshelf Muse.Check out their emotional thesaurus, weather thesaurus and so much more to help writers.

    Angela Ackerman

 

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Voting for your favorite December “My Gutsy Story” starts on January 1st-January 11th. The December winner will be announced on Thursday January 12th.

Please leave your comments for Cheryl below.

Comments

  1. Sonia Marsh says

    Thank you Cherly for this brave and inspiring story about running with the bulls in Pamplona. One question? What is cava? I know Kava from Fiji, but I’m sure it’s not the same.

    • Cheryl Stahle says

      Cava is Spanish champagne…not to be confused with the French version. There is quite the debate over who actually created the first sparkling champagne and opinions are heated. All I know is that cava is delightful!

      • Sonia Marsh says

        Thanks for explaining this. I thought of the horrible Kava that tastes like mud, in Fiji, that sort of numbs your mouth.

  2. barbara says

    What a fun and uplifting Gutsy Story Cheryl! And, you live in my neck of the woods. I, too, am a lover of Cava… and Prosecco (the Italian champagne).

    Perhaps you could join The Blogstress Network. I’m planning some expansion for the coming year.

    Thanks for sharing these stories Sonia! I’m planning one soon.
    b

    • Sonia Marsh says

      Barbara,

      Look forward to your story Barbara. I have joined the Blogstress Network and encourage other women to do the same.
      Perhaps we can all meet?

    • Cheryl Stahle says

      Cava is great….hard to find the good stuff in the US but worth the search
      Would love to join Blogstress Network…let’s make 2012 a year of great blogging. Remember to vote starting Jan 1

  4. Nikki says

    What a surprising way to get over a divorce and such a brave and exciting thing to do. I am amazed by your courage. I love that you have such a wonderful memory to turn to and also the physical reminder of the red sash.
    I too am recently divorced and made some major changes. Nothing as risky as this though. You have inspired me to consider a challenge much more exciting than I have done before. Maybe shark diving…
    Thanks for the inspiring story.
    Nikki recently posted..Mudgee Rocks!My Profile

    • Cheryl Stahle says

      Always such a heart warmer to know that my writing inspires. You can do whatever you put your mind too–I truly believe that. As Anasis Nin says, “And the day came when the risk it took to remain tight inside the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.” Let yourself blossom into a new flower. Don’t foget to vote and follow my blog and me on Twitter and FB.
      Cheryl Stahle recently posted..Reprioritizing…moving from chaosMy Profile

  11. Julia says

    Cheryl, I love your story and sense of literally “taking the bull by the horns” 🙂 in life. An excellent way to live. I live in Spain myself (and enjoy a good cava now and then), but have yet to experience the rush of the Running. In your writing, I can feel the intensity of the moment. And beautiful picture in your red sash too – this would be a good one for those moment that need a bit of lift. Thanks for writing!
    Julia recently posted..Esther Kane on Embracing AgingMy Profile

    • Cheryl Stahle says

      Hola! I loved Spain so much and the pace of live. Toledo was my favorite city I must admit. Rush is one way to describe the running–I was surprised by the young children out and about not remembering at times that this truly is a religious festival. Please follow my blog and vote in January. I hope that you too get to experience the Run some day.
      Cheryl Stahle recently posted..Reprioritizing…moving from chaosMy Profile

  12. Maggie says

    Wow, Cheryl, your first time away and you go running with bulls! Isn’t it amazing what we can do when we allow ourselves free rein in every sense.

    I was wondering how you would follow that up and I see here you’re off to Costa Rica………a completely different continent this time. Good for you.

    Have a wonderful time exploring the Mark 2 version of yourself!

    • Cheryl Stahle says

      I have let myself go and what an adventure that I discovered…my writer’s voice is also flowing again. Can’t wait for Costa Rica between the rain forests, ziplining, rapelling and a few other surprises I have planned I’ll be writing travel blogs next. Thanks for stopping by, follow me on my website and don’t forget to vote Jan 1.
      Cheryl Stahle recently posted..Reprioritizing…moving from chaosMy Profile

  18. Warren Baldwin says

    My wife was in Spain for the running of the bulls when she was in high school. She watched, didn’t run, and I would do if I was there! Great story and courage. Not just the running of the bulls, but picking up and moving on from where you are in life when a set back hits. Good job.
    Warren Baldwin recently posted.."Thanks for Not Aborting Me"My Profile

  19. Penelope J. says

    Fantastic story, Cheryl. Never knew anyone who ran with the bulls in Pamplona so your experience is also a first for me. I’ve done a lot of brave/crazy things in my life, but this is not one I’d even try. So good for you to break out from the midlife doldrums.
    Penelope J. recently posted..Never Give Up on Your DreamMy Profile

  21. Lois Joy Hofmann says

    Good luck, Cheryl, on your next adventures! Now that those endorphins are kicking in, I’m sure that you will not stop with a mere bull run. Imagine what lies in store for you next!

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