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“My Gutsy Story” by Cheryl Stahle

December 19, 2011 by Sonia Marsh

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Just Another Religious Festival

“OK”.  And with that one word, my 15 year marriage ended.  We had both given up so there were no fights or last hurrahs to save our union.  I wanted our son.  Done.  He wanted his pension.  OK.  We actually negotiated the division of property at Starbucks over lattes.  Dutch treat!

It doesn’t get any better than that for a friendly divorce.

However, I had spent the previous 15 years as an ice hockey mom and school teacher for at-risk teens.  For this 70s throwback of peace, love, rock and roll, violence didn’t fit with my belief system; however, circumstances dropped it into my lap daily both at home and at school.  Along the way I disappeared while serving the needs of everyone else.  I couldn’t even remember what I enjoyed doing and I didn’t know where to start in creating Cheryl Version 2.0, middle aged edition.

Slowly I experienced rebirth, dabbled in online dating (just don’t!), raised an amazing son and developed deep interests in yoga, reading and writing. My regular haunts included Starbucks, yoga studios and bookstores.  Not exactly the life of a thrill-seeker but joy appeared in subtle ways through the perfect backbend or a well written novel devoured over a latte and cookie.   I was restless though.  After so many years living in ice rinks and never taking a vacation I had to blow off some steam and this lovely life I had created did not include adventure.

Three weeks.  That became my gift of time and for once in my adult life, I had freedom.  Throw caution to the wind, this was a childless adventure.  My friends thought I’d head to the shore with a stack of books when I shared the news of a getaway.  Not this time.

The Festival of San Fermin!  That’s where I chose to go so I planned a vacation around that religious holiday.  Traveling to the major cities of Spain introduced me to centuries old neighborhoods, gothic cathedrals, and fabulous museums.  I soaked it all in while spending siesta time sitting in plazas drinking cava.  Three weeks.  Time for me.  And for kicks, I went alone and did not activate international cell phone service.   No one to tell me when to get up, what to eat for dinner, or how to spend the days.

I enjoyed 2 glorious weeks traveling throughout Spain with my camera in hand.  I wandered through street markets, toured museums and palaces and chose to view only masterpieces at the Prado.  I even crashed a wedding reception.  Why not?  No one really knew what I was doing but me.  I enjoyed freedom for the first time.

Did I mention that the Festival of San Fermin is more commonly called the Running of the Bulls in Pamplona?   I didn’t tell too many people from home either.  I certainly didn’t tell my mother what adventure awaited me.  My guess was that wouldn’t go over too well.

The bulls in Pamplona

A train ride later, I entered the tiny village of Pamplona.  The annual kickoff food fight had fortunately already ended by the time I settled into my hotel but the partying had just begun.  I began to realize that my standard glass of wine was not going to be the norm for the next few days.

Mardi Gras looked tame compared to Pamplona during the festival.  Dressed in obligatory whites with red sash and scarf, I elbowed my way through the crowds to enter the streets.  Once there, African conga drums played, strangers pulled me into their arms to dance in the street and mimes entertained all.  Music poured forth from stores and vendors filled the streets selling t-shirts and flags. The streets provided sensory overload but once I got into a rhythm, the crowds became invisible.   Callemucho .  The drink of San Fermin poured freely usually by flask or 2 gallon jug.

Cheryl Stahl in Pamplona

After a night of partying and no sleep, the actual festival began.  Fueled with over a decade of pent up energy, I  chanted “let ‘em loose”  in my mind.  Catch me if you can.  But I’m not quite as foolhardy as it appears.

First, most of the people running had imbibed for at least 24 hours.  I chose to toss back just one flask of Callemucho (cheap wine and soda).  Juts for courage I thought but my balance remained rock solid.  Next, a plan.  I wasn’t about to run on a cobblestone street the width of a standard American alley full of drunks without knowing the lay of the land.  I watched the first day, safely ensconced on a balcony two stories above bull level.

Day 2 however I joined the crowd in the street.  My earlier reconnaissance showed that the end of the run was safer as there were fewer people (still packed shoulder to shoulder), a bit more space on the street and a fence to leap over should the need arise.  So that’s where I planned the start of my run.

I heard the shot indicating that the bulls had left their pens, waited my 17 seconds for them to arrive, and then hit the street.  There they were, 10 agitated, magnificent 2000 pound beasts and me soaking wet at 115 pounds.  This sister ran fast, smelled their musky odor as they swept by and breathed a sigh of relief as I choked on their dust when they roared past.  My 2 seconds of glory.  Not trampled, not hurt and only a slight glow of perspiration on my brow.   I ran with the bulls.  Feel my power now people!

This single mom can do anything these days.   When life gets tough or when I’m feeling a bit beaten up, I don my red sash from Pamplona, look at the photos I took of the bulls on my desk and smile.  I found my inner courage again.  I’m getting to know myself too.  Life’s not so bad as Version 2.0.

 

Cheryl Stahle, memoirist, author and founder ofYour Best Writing Group (www.yourbestwritinggroup.com) lives in Doylestown, PA with her son.  Cheryl consults with aspiring authors to guide them in telling their life stories.  She has a special interest in working with adoptive families as an adoptive parent herself.

*****

Thank you Cheryl for giving women the courage to do something so unique and spectacular for themselves. I am a firm believer that when you get out of your comfort zone, you get that special feeling that you can accomplish anything in your life and you are a perfect example of this.

*****

Do you have a “My Gutsy Story”?

To submit your own, “My Gutsy Story” you can find all the information, and our sponsors on the “My Gutsy Story” contest page. (NEW VIDEO) Submission guidelines here.

*****

Jill Fales, winner of our first “My Gutsy Story” contest, picked the following prize:

  • Spectrum Specialties and Awards just joined on 11/2/11 with a wonderful prize: 1000 14pt business cards with UV coating, full color process, & double sided print. I am so thrilled as I know they do quality work.

Rhonda Hayes, came in second. Since she was the first to submit her story and since this was the first contest, she also won a prize and selected a chapter critique from Angela Ackerman..

  • Angela Ackerman offered two choices: a first chapter critique or a blog consultation offering her expertise on your blog layout, content, etc and offer advice on tweaking it to improve, draw in visitors, increase visibility, etc. Winner can choose which would benefit them more. Angela and Becca have put together the most helpful blog for writers called The Bookshelf Muse.Check out their emotional thesaurus, weather thesaurus and so much more to help writers.

    Angela Ackerman

 

*****

Voting for your favorite December “My Gutsy Story” starts on January 1st-January 11th. The December winner will be announced on Thursday January 12th.

Please leave your comments for Cheryl below.

Filed Under: Inspirational, My Gutsy Story, People, Travel & Adventure Tagged With: "My Gutsy Story", Cheryl Stahle, Pamplona, Spain, Women and Divorce

Comments

  1. Sonia Marsh says

    December 19, 2011 at 8:14 am

    Thank you Cherly for this brave and inspiring story about running with the bulls in Pamplona. One question? What is cava? I know Kava from Fiji, but I’m sure it’s not the same.

    • Cheryl Stahle says

      December 19, 2011 at 8:59 am

      Cava is Spanish champagne…not to be confused with the French version. There is quite the debate over who actually created the first sparkling champagne and opinions are heated. All I know is that cava is delightful!

      • Sonia Marsh says

        December 19, 2011 at 10:50 am

        Thanks for explaining this. I thought of the horrible Kava that tastes like mud, in Fiji, that sort of numbs your mouth.

  2. barbara says

    December 19, 2011 at 9:17 am

    What a fun and uplifting Gutsy Story Cheryl! And, you live in my neck of the woods. I, too, am a lover of Cava… and Prosecco (the Italian champagne).

    Perhaps you could join The Blogstress Network. I’m planning some expansion for the coming year.

    Thanks for sharing these stories Sonia! I’m planning one soon.
    b

    • Sonia Marsh says

      December 19, 2011 at 10:53 am

      Barbara,

      Look forward to your story Barbara. I have joined the Blogstress Network and encourage other women to do the same.
      Perhaps we can all meet?

    • Cheryl Stahle says

      December 19, 2011 at 3:18 pm

      Cava is great….hard to find the good stuff in the US but worth the search
      Would love to join Blogstress Network…let’s make 2012 a year of great blogging. Remember to vote starting Jan 1

  3. Miss Footloose | Life in the Expat Lane says

    December 19, 2011 at 9:17 am

    Great story, Cheryl! Building a new, happy life and learning about who you are after a life-changing event takes so much courage. I love the idea of overcoming fear by running with the bulls in Pamplona!
    Miss Footloose | Life in the Expat Lane recently posted..Expat Trouble: Encounter With a Toilet LadyMy Profile

    • Cheryl Stahle says

      December 19, 2011 at 3:20 pm

      If you would have asked me 10 years ago if I’d run with the bulls I would have just laughed. Next adventure: heading to Costa Rica. Don’t forget to vote starting Jan 1 and follow me on twitter and on my website.
      Cheryl Stahle recently posted..Reprioritizing…moving from chaosMy Profile

  4. Nikki says

    December 19, 2011 at 12:56 pm

    What a surprising way to get over a divorce and such a brave and exciting thing to do. I am amazed by your courage. I love that you have such a wonderful memory to turn to and also the physical reminder of the red sash.
    I too am recently divorced and made some major changes. Nothing as risky as this though. You have inspired me to consider a challenge much more exciting than I have done before. Maybe shark diving…
    Thanks for the inspiring story.
    Nikki recently posted..Mudgee Rocks!My Profile

    • Cheryl Stahle says

      December 19, 2011 at 3:21 pm

      Always such a heart warmer to know that my writing inspires. You can do whatever you put your mind too–I truly believe that. As Anasis Nin says, “And the day came when the risk it took to remain tight inside the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.” Let yourself blossom into a new flower. Don’t foget to vote and follow my blog and me on Twitter and FB.
      Cheryl Stahle recently posted..Reprioritizing…moving from chaosMy Profile

  5. Kristel Mae says

    December 19, 2011 at 5:58 pm

    I love the story you have provided us here…I hope you can post more then…
    Kristel Mae recently posted..sports flooring | rubber sports flooring | gym flooringMy Profile

    • Cheryl Stahle says

      December 20, 2011 at 7:12 am

      I post regularly on my site….check it out. Glad you enjoyed the post. Please remember to vote Jan 1.
      Cheryl Stahle recently posted..Reprioritizing…moving from chaosMy Profile

  6. Lady Fi says

    December 19, 2011 at 9:34 pm

    What a delightful story! And so well written too.
    Lady Fi recently posted..The triumph of lightMy Profile

    • Cheryl Stahle says

      December 20, 2011 at 7:12 am

      Many thanks….this was certainly an adventure. Check out my website for more stories and don’t forget to vote Jan 1
      Cheryl Stahle recently posted..Reprioritizing…moving from chaosMy Profile

  7. Jill Fales says

    December 19, 2011 at 10:34 pm

    Cheryl,
    I do feel your power!
    Excellent description of when the bulls ran past you. I love your energy, courage and passion. Great writing, love the build up.

    Jill
    Jill Fales recently posted..A Lucky FeelingMy Profile

    • Cheryl Stahle says

      December 20, 2011 at 7:13 am

      Glad you liked the build up…that was the fun part of writing this. I won’t ever forget that moment when I was done and still safe! Follow along and don’t forget to vote (congrats on your win too)
      Cheryl Stahle recently posted..Reprioritizing…moving from chaosMy Profile

  8. Richard says

    December 20, 2011 at 5:27 am

    Great story, Cheryl. Love your blog, too. IMHO, it takes just as much “guts” to step out on your own as a writer. Maybe even more!
    Richard recently posted..Joy To The WorldMy Profile

    • Cheryl Stahle says

      December 20, 2011 at 4:05 pm

      I totlly agree with you Richard. I have a book coming out in 2012 and just sending my “baby” for people to edit was tough because I didn’t want anyone to hurt it. Follow along on my website for more adventures. Don’t forget to vote Jan 1
      Cheryl Stahle recently posted..Reprioritizing…moving from chaosMy Profile

  9. Muriel says

    December 20, 2011 at 10:42 am

    Thanks for another uplifting story! You could have had a breakdown or become angry and bitter, but instead you took control. YAY to you!
    Muriel recently posted..War Of WordsMy Profile

    • Cheryl Stahle says

      December 20, 2011 at 4:07 pm

      Becoming bitter only hurts me and my son. I was definitely angry but that passed as forgiveness occurred. Happily I can say that I have a wonderful friedship with my ex and I wouldn’t want it any other way. Follow my website and don’t forget to vote.
      Cheryl Stahle recently posted..Reprioritizing…moving from chaosMy Profile

  10. Felly says

    December 20, 2011 at 10:01 pm

    Hi Cheryl…Thanks a lot for the great post you have here for us…Thanks for the story…
    Felly recently posted..About Internet MarketingMy Profile

  11. Julia says

    December 20, 2011 at 11:41 pm

    Cheryl, I love your story and sense of literally “taking the bull by the horns” 🙂 in life. An excellent way to live. I live in Spain myself (and enjoy a good cava now and then), but have yet to experience the rush of the Running. In your writing, I can feel the intensity of the moment. And beautiful picture in your red sash too – this would be a good one for those moment that need a bit of lift. Thanks for writing!
    Julia recently posted..Esther Kane on Embracing AgingMy Profile

    • Cheryl Stahle says

      December 21, 2011 at 7:35 am

      Hola! I loved Spain so much and the pace of live. Toledo was my favorite city I must admit. Rush is one way to describe the running–I was surprised by the young children out and about not remembering at times that this truly is a religious festival. Please follow my blog and vote in January. I hope that you too get to experience the Run some day.
      Cheryl Stahle recently posted..Reprioritizing…moving from chaosMy Profile

  12. Maggie says

    December 21, 2011 at 9:26 am

    Wow, Cheryl, your first time away and you go running with bulls! Isn’t it amazing what we can do when we allow ourselves free rein in every sense.

    I was wondering how you would follow that up and I see here you’re off to Costa Rica………a completely different continent this time. Good for you.

    Have a wonderful time exploring the Mark 2 version of yourself!

    • Cheryl Stahle says

      December 21, 2011 at 11:41 am

      I have let myself go and what an adventure that I discovered…my writer’s voice is also flowing again. Can’t wait for Costa Rica between the rain forests, ziplining, rapelling and a few other surprises I have planned I’ll be writing travel blogs next. Thanks for stopping by, follow me on my website and don’t forget to vote Jan 1.
      Cheryl Stahle recently posted..Reprioritizing…moving from chaosMy Profile

  13. Micky says

    December 22, 2011 at 6:08 pm

    Thanks Cheryl for the nice thoughts you have shared to us here…Great job!!
    Micky recently posted..hotels in paigntonMy Profile

    • Cheryl Stahle says

      December 24, 2011 at 3:24 pm

      Thanks Micky….this was a great adventure. I’m glad you enjoyed this. Please follow my blog and website http://www.yourbestwritinggroup.com and don’t forget to vote. Happy Holidays!
      Cheryl Stahle recently posted..Christmas ClarityMy Profile

  14. Gianeli says

    December 27, 2011 at 6:50 pm

    For me, this is really cool…Thanks!!
    Gianeli recently posted..The World of Football ForecastsMy Profile

  15. Ange says

    January 1, 2012 at 6:42 pm

    Awesome story Cheryl! Its wonderful reading such an inspiring story!

  16. Stephy says

    January 1, 2012 at 7:35 pm

    Thanks for the awesome story you are always providing us through your site…Great job!!
    Stephy recently posted..Happy New Year To All Of You And Hope You Like The Aquarium Fish Photos Here …My Profile

  17. Terri Conway says

    January 2, 2012 at 6:55 am

    Great story Cheryl! I am so proud to know you! – Terri

  18. Warren Baldwin says

    January 2, 2012 at 10:11 am

    My wife was in Spain for the running of the bulls when she was in high school. She watched, didn’t run, and I would do if I was there! Great story and courage. Not just the running of the bulls, but picking up and moving on from where you are in life when a set back hits. Good job.
    Warren Baldwin recently posted.."Thanks for Not Aborting Me"My Profile

  19. Penelope J. says

    January 2, 2012 at 8:52 pm

    Fantastic story, Cheryl. Never knew anyone who ran with the bulls in Pamplona so your experience is also a first for me. I’ve done a lot of brave/crazy things in my life, but this is not one I’d even try. So good for you to break out from the midlife doldrums.
    Penelope J. recently posted..Never Give Up on Your DreamMy Profile

  20. Jody says

    January 3, 2012 at 7:49 am

    Great story Cheryl…good luck.

  21. Lois Joy Hofmann says

    January 11, 2012 at 7:51 pm

    Good luck, Cheryl, on your next adventures! Now that those endorphins are kicking in, I’m sure that you will not stop with a mere bull run. Imagine what lies in store for you next!

Trackbacks

  1. What does beauty mean to you? | Sonia Marsh - Gutsy Living says:
    January 5, 2012 at 11:22 am

    […] Cheryl Stahle […]

  2. Winner of the "My Gutsy Story" contest for December 2011. | Sonia Marsh - Gutsy Living says:
    January 12, 2012 at 7:06 am

    […] Cheryl Stahle (45%, 145 Votes) […]

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