“I had tried and tried to get them to see me. If I wasn’t an accident, if my mother was telling me the truth, wasn’t this worse? If I wasn’t an accident, mustn’t I be a crushing disappointment? My father couldn’t bear to be with me. It was as if to do so, caused him more physical pain than all his ailments combined and my mother lived in exile within her own mind, devoted only to the past.”
After hearing Augusten Burroughs read this paragraph from his book, A Wolf at the Table, my thoughts turned to how we all carry baggage with us into adulthood based on how we were raised.
Some of us, myself included, were fortunate to receive unconditional love at home. Others were not that fortunate during their childhood.
In his book, Augusten Burroughs put me in the skin of a small boy longing for unconditional love from a parent. He is so brutally honest as he talks about the “unspeakably terrifying relationship between father and son.”
This lead me to do a search on how parenting affects children. I found a simple graphic on Dr. Phil’s website which I copied below.
He has a quiz which allows you to identify your parenting style. I did one section for fun, and actually scored higher than the highest score mentioned for that section. You might be wondering which one? A description of each style of parenting is also given at the bottom of the quiz. Most of us probably fit into several categories, although when I look at my three sons, I can quite clearly pin-point which category they fit in.
My blogger friend Jennifer Fink, focuses on raising boys. I always find useful information on her site.
How about you? Anything you want to share about your childhood, your style of parenting, or parenting in general?