“My Gutsy Story®” by Lola Di Giulio De Maci
The Beginning of Tomorrow
I had always wanted to go back to school. And one day, thirty years later, I did. I don’t know what gave me the guts to do it other than a real burning desire to finish something I had started years ago. When the day came to register, I was terrified and got “cold feet.”
“I decided that I’m not going back to school,” I told my family. “I don’t really want this after all. I’m going to forget about it.”
My daughter, who was a freshman in college at the time, sensed my apprehension. “Mom,” she said pleadingly, “you’ve wanted to do this all your life. I’ll go with you to register; I’ll even stand in line for you.” And that she did.
I had dropped out of college in my senior year, and now it was like starting all over again. I didn’t know where to start. As chance would have it, in one of the first textbooks I opened as “an older returning student,” I came across a quote by Lewis Carroll from Alice in Wonderland and Through the Looking Glass: “Begin at the beginning,” the King said gravely, “and go on till you come to the end; then stop.” My sentiments exactly, Mr. Carroll. Thank you.
But it had been a long time since I had “cracked a book.” I studied sometimes eight hours a day, forgetting to eat lunch or feed the goldfish. My husband and I would have to make dates in order to see one another, and at times I felt guilty for choosing to spend an hour in the library and then having to make dinner from a box.
When my graduation day finally arrived, I was ecstatic. Not only was I fulfilling a lifelong dream, but my daughter was also graduating – on the same day. We had a mother-daughter celebration with family and friends, proudly displaying our newly-acquired Bachelor of Arts degrees. I have never been so proud of my daughter. And when my daughter stood next to me at picture-taking time, our black robes blending into one, I could tell that she was very proud of her mother.
Shortly after graduation, I attained a teaching credential. And because I loved to learn and found teaching to be one of the best avenues to learning, I decided to continue my studies and go for a Master of Arts degree in education and creative writing. It was an excellent choice. I loved teaching, and I loved writing. And with a degree in Interdisciplinary Studies, I could combine the two.
Graduate school was exhausting and overwhelming at times. I cut my hair short and got the first permanent of my life so that I wouldn’t have to bother with setting my hair… and I found out that I could live without my nightly rendezvous with Ted Danson from “Cheers.”
The next two years flew by, but it wasn’t easy. At one point, I came home from school, threw my books on the kitchen counter, and announced to my family: “I’m quitting! I’ve had it!” After crying for a couple of hours and talking it over with my family, I realized that I had come too far to quit now. I had run the race well, and I was tired. I decided I would take one day at a time, resting along the sidelines.
I was in my final quarter of graduate school with only one class left to take when I found out I had cancer. Cancer. Was I going to die? Would I have to leave my children so soon? Would I be able to finish school?
A couple days later, shaken and apprehensive, I appeared at my professor’s door, leaving a puddle of tears and broken dreams on his shoulders. “Don’t worry about it,” he said. “We can work something out.”
“But I have to go to Los Angeles for seven weeks of radiation therapy and won’t be able to come to class.” He suggested that I do my work in Los Angeles and send it to him through the mail. We could keep in touch by telephone.
“And don’t give up,” he said adamantly. “I have never met a student with so much determination. You are the kind of student teachers come to school for. And you have to use that same determination to fight this thing.”
I promised him I would finish my school work, and I would fight for my life. The kitchen table in my apartment in Los Angeles became my desk for the next seven weeks. I would go for my treatment and return to my apartment to study and write my papers. I mailed my completed assignments from a post office nearby.
Right before Christmas, I graduated with honors with a Master of Arts degree in education and English. My graduation day was special for a lot of reasons. I had finished my radiation treatments and had finished my school work. My husband and my children, along with my mother, sister, and brother, were in the audience of the auditorium when they called my name and handed me my diploma. My eyes met their eyes and I wanted to shout, “Hey! Look at me! I did it!” And after I passed my tassel to the left side of my cap from the right, I waved to them like I was royalty. Queen Elizabeth had nothing on me!
As I write this piece, I am eighteen years free of breast cancer. I take each day and live it, celebrating the miracle of each brand-new morning.
Over the years I have had the privilege of teaching many children and have lived to see them doing great things with their lives. And best of all, I have lived to see my daughter become a teacher and my son, a psychologist. Talk about pride!
And in my quiet times, I write – something I’ve loved to do since I was a child.
Life doesn’t get much better than this.
LOLA Di GIULIO De MACI lives in southern California where she gathers inspiration for her stories, some appearing in The Ultimate Series, Tending Your Inner Garden, the Kids’ Reading Room of the Los Angeles Times, and in several editions of Chicken Soup for the Soul. Lola realized her dream when she graduated with her bachelor’s degree at age 51, and a master’s degree at 55. A retired teacher, she continues writing from her loft overlooking the San Bernardino Mountains. Contact her at: LDeMaci@aol.com.
SONIA MARSH SAYS: Your story Lola, is the perfect example of someone “gutsy,” who never gave up. I love what your teacher said, “You are the kind of student teachers come to school for.” Your family must be as proud of you as you are of them.
Remember to VOTE for your favorite October 2013 here.
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Lola,
We need to hear about people like you, and how you persevered. I’m so impressed with you not quitting and sticking to your first, and then your 2nd goal, of studying for your Masters degree. Thanks again for submitting such an inspiring story.
Sonia Marsh recently posted..How I Finally Got My Degree After 30 Years.
Sonia,
Thank you for your lovely words. My father, who immigrated to America from Italy when he was seventeen years old, always told my sisters, brother and I: “If you have your education, you have the world.” He was right.
Lola,
This writing did not surprise me. Why, because it is pure you. You go about your life in a quiet but aggressive manner. Yes, I said aggressive! Now if I can only convince you to return home and visit the Northeast end.
One of men I admire is Lt. Colonel David Grossman. He is a retired Army ranger and is a very accomplished author. If he were to read your writing above, he would have one simple response.
“Hooah!”
Dick, my cousin,
There are so many wonderful people in the world doing wonderful things with their lives. Thank you for sharing Lt. Colonel Grossman’s “Hooha!” with me. I’m going to add that word to my vocabulary. And, yes, the Northeast end might just be in my future. That’s another dream that just might come true.
Dear Lola,
Congratulations on you wonderful “Gutsy Story” and even more o your determination to achieve your dreams even though it took years of time and hard work. You are the kind of woman who make all of us proud and happy. You bring a smile of love and joy to all who know you. I am sure that Sister Valeria is up there telling everyone that you were her best and favorite student. Thanks for sharing this with me. I am so happy for you and I pray that you continue in good health.
Dear Sister Evelyn,
I got my love of words and how to express myself with them from the Benedictine nuns. I will forever be grateful. You and the Sisters planted the passion, and it continues to grow. It thrills me to know that Sister Valeria is looking down on me from heaven and smiling. Yes, she was the one who taught me how to conjugate a verb, identify the eight parts of speech in a sentence, and to diagram a sentence. These are all tools that help me design my own sentences today. Thank you.
Lola:
You never cease to amaze me. You have a natural talent for writing and you showed your best in this story. I can say I knew you when we lived across the street from each other. Wishes for continued success and good health.
Loretta, my cousin,
Little did we know that when we were playing in your basement and eating red Jell-o in your kitchen that I would one day write stories about these things. Thank you for always being a source of support for me. I couldn’t have picked a better godmother.
Dear Lola! What a BEAUTIFUL story! You are an amazing writer and such an inspiration to me. I can’t wait to see your next story! PS – I agree with Uncle Dick — PLEASE come see us!!
Love, CHRIS 🙂
Dear Chris,
I get so much of my inspiration from my family — and I’m so glad you are a part of it. To be able to share my life in words with all of you humbles me. Someday, hopefully, there will be a grand reunion.
Congratuliotn from ITALY!!! We are so proud here to have an uncle like you!!!!
Mille Grazie, Fausto di Italia!
My father would be proud to know that my story has made it to his home country and our people. I carry his name and his dream with pride. Con affetto molto, Zia Lola
Lola,
Your determination is inspiring. Thank you for a lovely story that is from the heart.
Dear Cheryl,
Thank you for being part of my writing journey. You have shared my manuscripts and my dream from the beginning. Here’s to the written word!
What a wonderful and inspiring story. I always know from the time we were kids that you were someone special. Thanks for sharing your story.
Dear Cousin Rosemary,
I was the storyteller on the block in our neighborhood as we were growmg up. I always loved a good story, and now I am telling stories with my pen. Thank you for believing in me. It means a lot.
Cousin Lola,
I am delighted you told your story of your struggle with breast Cancer and how you were able to go to have a successful career. You are an inspiration to others experiencing a similar quagmire in their life.
God Bless,
Cousin Dolores
Dear Cousin Dolores,
it’s not always easy writing about cancer, but I’m glad I told my story. I salute the women who have walked this journey. They each have their own story to tell. And I will listen.
This is such a beautiful story and so inspiring on so many levels: your courage, your love of learning, and the way you and Maria inspired and supported each other. I always look forward to reading more of your heartwarming, spirit-lifting writing.
Dear Maureen,
Thank you for your beautiful words. And thank you for being on the other end of the phone when I read my rough draft manuscripts, looking for encouragement, support, and ways to make my story better. I appreciate it very much. Now, I’m on to the next project…
Lovely story, Lola. I posted the link to it on one of my Facebook writer groups and asked some of my writing buddies to read it and consider casting their vote for you. (I couldn’t find you on Facebook, but would suggest that you consider opening a free Facebook account,since there’s several worthwhile groups for nonfiction and memoir writers.)