Craig, a sixteen-year-old hears the voices of his parents and his sister say, “Don’t do it,” and wakes up in a sweat.
He bonds with a man in the ward, who has an eight-year-old daughter. They play basketball, and he gives Craig the positive attention and advice that he is not receiving from his own father. Through this, Craig also changes people in the psychiatric ward, and when he leaves after five days, he’s a different person. He’s learned to become a kid with a passion for life.
In an article on teenagers and stress, I found the following as major causes of stress:
- high expectations placed upon them by
- parents and teachers
- participating in extracurricular activities
- being over-scheduled
Now I know Craig is a bright sixteen-year-old with goals, and there are also many examples of teenagers without goals, however, have things changed that much? Are there more young people stressing out today? Is it harder to be a teenager today than when you grew up?
Every American High school with an AP program is JAMMED PACK with stressed out kids…. it used to break my heart…watching them compete for class rankings…. all with their parents "cheering" them on…
I may never be fully known but the speculation was that the pressures placed on Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold are what set them to their murderous rampage at Columbine High School. This was an upper-class district where a lot of pressure is put on kids to be the best, to achieve at all costs, least you fall behind in society. We will never know, but the stress put on kids these days is intense.
@Kelli
I would like to know if you see the same in Danish high schools Kelli?
@Robert the Skeptic
I did not think of that. Thanks for bringing up Columbine High School.
What a sad story even though the result was positive. A stressed-out kid checks himself into a psychiatric ward. Why should it have to come to that? Parents place too much pressure on their kids/teenagers to get good grades, make it a kind of competition whereby if they don't match up to expectations, they feel they are losers and disappointments.
Is that fair? Is that just? Isn't is delightful that the parents were so pleased at the results of Craig's stay in the psychiatric ward? Are they that blind to their own part in it? How many other kids actually break down, commit suicide or have mental problems as a result of the stress placed on them to get top grades?
Something is very wrong with this system though I have heard that the incidence of suicides among teens in Japan is highest in the world.
I agree with Robert's comments about Columbine and I worry that the stress incucing pressure is being put on kids in even the pre-teen years these days.
@Penelope
I feel the same way. My youngest son has felt stressed, but that's because he's in a new military school where they have so much stuff going on and a strict schedule. He decided he wanted to go, not us pushing him. He is getting used to his new life and says it's getting easier. I hope so.
@Jeanie
You bring up a good point about pre-teens. I know you have grandkids. Are they old enough yet, that you see that in them?
I think that some cultures place a higher value on grades and this stressed out teenagers.
Things are pretty low-key here in Sweden. I think it is very much up to the parents though to make sure their kids are not doing too much extra-curricular stuff and definitely not put too much importance on grades and school work.
Sometimes we forget that it is good for kids to take it slow, be bored, just be….
Kids are the same they always been, all over the globe.
In Japan kids are really stressed, competition is hard.
In western world kids need parents who are adults, not their friends. Kids need to trust and build good image of themselves, not comparing to anybody but feel good as individual, respected human being.
Too many parents are not adults. They want to be teens for ever.
Kids should enjoy learning new things. Enjoy.
If we adults don't respect people who work in restaurants, shops, transportation, cleaning etc. how can their children respect professions which without this world would be a total mess.
We, adults, teachers etc. can change the system easier for kids. It's our responsibility. We are the ones who are demanding too much – once again – we should look at the mirror if kids are stressed…
I think we are all more stressed than was previously common. Everyone is working under greater expectations and worries, so it's no wonder that teenagers feel it and especially when so when they look ahead and see that life rarely gets better. Blimey, I'm miserable tonight.
While I cannot say that I was "over-scheduled," I certainly experienced huge expectations, from my parents particularly. In the end, I think those expectations created in me a fear of failure which sabotaged my best efforts.
I have yet to recover from that fear, that stress.
I'm visiting from Rob-bear. This is a very important subject and needs our full attention.
@Ladyfi,
You sound like me in that I also believe kids need to just be. I remember as a teenager, enjoying time to think in my own room. Not always be told or forced to do things.
@BLOGitse
I remember reading about Japanese kids being stressed, but I thought they were rebelling more and that perhaps things have shifted and teenagers in the US and other developed countries around the world are stressing more. Am I right or wrong?
@Madame De Farge
Thanks for your comment and yes, Blimey, you are sounding depressed, but so are the kids.
@Rob-bear
Thanks for your comment today, especially as I know how you are feeling. Nice to hear from you. We all want you to feel better.
@lakeviewer
Thanks for visiting. Good point.
as the parent of two i am very familiar with this subject. so much is expected of our kids today, and 99% of it is attached to the college application process, with all the standardized testing, AP classes, endless extracurricular activities and mountains of homework that often begins before the child has even entered high school. i want to say stop the madness, but until a paradigm shift happens regarding the whole college process (and it may be happening sooner than we think, in the form of a decreased population of applicants due to financial realities and lower birth rates) this will likely continue for the visible future.
btw, welcome back sonia! nice to see you out and about here in blogland- let us know when your book is published!
Stress comes in different forms for a teenager. When I was in Catholic school there was pressure to keep grades up.
Everyone dressed the same–no pressure there. There was little money in my family, so I felt
left out of many things.
The lack of money created stress on my parents which trickled down to me and my brother.
Thankfully, we were a close-bonded
family, and we weathered many difficulties.
Teens have their parents to please regarding expectations and achievement in school.
Bulging classroom size, the bullying trend, self-image/keeping up appearances, all play into teen stress.
We parents may not always agree
with our kids about what we think is important.
The time parents spend on their own self indulgences should be equally attributed to a personal time with their children.
Listen when they want you to listen and praise them, no matter what.