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Vote For Your Favorite June 2013 “My Gutsy Story®”

June 27, 2013 by Sonia Marsh 1 Comment

VOTE BE GUTSY BADGE

The voting starts right now for your favorite June 2013 “My Gutsy Story®.” You have 2 weeks to vote. The winner will be announced on July 11th and gets to select a prize from our sponsors.

These are the first 4 stories to be included in our 2nd Anthology. You are invited to our GREAT LAUNCH PARTY for  our first “My Gutsy Story®” Anthology at the South Coast Village Regency Movie Theater, Costa Mesa, CA, on September 26th, from 6-9 pm. Keep checking “Gutsy Living” blog for updates on sponsors, etc.

Scroll Down on Sidebar (right above the Freeways to Flip-Flops Book Cover) to Vote. Only ONE vote each.

Our first moving story of the month was from Mary Hamer.

Mary Hamer
Mary Hamer

Mary shared her “My Gutsy Story®” of how she escaped her career and followed her passion.

Our second story this month is by Dixie Diamanti.

Dixie Diamante
Dixie Diamante

Dixie’s story is courageous in that she shares how she broke the “secret” of incest within her family.

Our third story is by Penelope James.

Penelope James
Penelope James

Pennie wrote such an inspiring “My Gutsy Story®” about how she overcame job loss, financial struggles, health problems and moved on.

Our last story of the month is by Jennifer Richardson.

1-Jennifer Richardson Face
Jennifer Richardson

Jennifer shares her honest account of not giving into the pressures of becoming a mother.

Do you have a “My Gutsy Story®” you’d like to share?

Would you like to submit your “My Gutsy Story®” and get  published in our 2nd anthology?

Please see guidelines below and contact Sonia Marsh at: sonia@soniamarsh.com for details.

You can find all the information, and our new sponsors on the “My Gutsy Story®” contest page. (VIDEO) Submission guidelines here

Visit us on Monday July 1st.  Liz Burgess will be sharing her “My Gutsy Story®.”

“My Gutsy Story®” Jennifer Richardson

June 24, 2013 by Sonia Marsh 11 Comments

1-Jennifer Richardson Face

The case of the missing biological clock

In 2005, I quit my job in Los Angeles and moved to London with my British husband. You might think moving to a new country is the heart of my gutsy story, but it’s really just a backdrop. My real gutsy story is about how, while living in England, I finally made the decision not to have kids.

This is a decision that may not seem gutsy to all. Accusations of selfishness abound for the childless by choice. And as if societal pressures weren’t enough, my own self-judgment was also a factor. Did my lack of desire to be a mother make me less of a woman? What was wrong with me? And where the hell was my biological clock and why had it failed to start ticking?

In fairness, there had been indications earlier in my life that I wasn’t destined for motherhood. Take, for example, how as a teenager I used to stand in front of the microwave when it was on and proclaim I was radiating my uterus to prevent impregnation. (In retrospect, I’m pretty sure I did that because I enjoyed shocking my mother.) Then later, as my friends started to have babies, I was not blind to my uncanny ability to make infants cry instantly upon contact.

But still some part of me held out for the possibility that I would change my mind. This was what was supposed to happen, right? After all, I had grown up in the eighties when well-meaning feminists were still pushing the belief that women could and should do it all: husband, kids, and a glass-ceiling-breaking career where you got to wear jewel-colored power suits with linebacker-worthy shoulder pads. Convinced I, too, could and should want to do it all, in my late-twenties I even went as far as to threaten to break off my engagement to my anti-children fiancé if he wasn’t willing to leave open the possibility that one day we may have kids. He caved, and I was a married woman at twenty-nine.

Then, in what seemed like the blink of an eye, thirty-five arrived and there was still no sign of my biological clock. This state of affairs made me uneasy. I knew beyond that age I was entering into high-risk territory for a pregnancy, my parents were highly vocal about their desperation for grandchildren, and my husband—eager to know once and for all if his life was going to involve children or not—was becoming as vocal as my parents in expressing his desire for me to just make a decision already. This is where my story takes a not-so-gutsy turn: I caved to the pressure and, that Christmas, my husband and I announced to my parents that we were going to “try” for a baby in the next year.

But even this game of chicken I had played with myself and my poor, unsuspecting family was not enough to kick start my biological clock. This became clear as the next year wore on and each month I somehow ended up at the pharmacy to pick up a refill of birth control. Despite the fact that I was still uneasy, I was finally starting to admit to myself that I didn’t really want to have kids.

Later that year I ended up in a neurologist’s office with what turned out to be symptoms of multiple sclerosis. It was a development that left my husband and parents as shocked as I was, and temporarily took the focus off the fact that I still hadn’t tried to get pregnant. As I grappled with the nature of that disease, which is unsettlingly mysterious in its cause, treatments, and prognosis, I tried desperately to get my neurologist to articulate something I could do that would lessen my chances of developing the full-blown ailment. After evading my previous attempts to pin him down, he finally caved at a follow-up appointment, half-heartedly mentioning a study that had shown some evidence pregnancy would reduce my risk. I couldn’t have been more shocked if he had said voodoo might help.

And that’s the moment when I realized I didn’t want to have kids. This was as good a reason as I was ever going to get to have a child, and yet my gut instantly said no. (Not to mention that as a strategy for lessening my chances of developing a chronic disease, pregnancy seemed at best risky and at worst unethical.) It’s been four years since that day, and, although I have since been diagnosed with MS—which in my case just means I have had a second bout of temporary and relatively benign symptoms—I can honestly say I have no regrets about my decision, other than the fact that I didn’t have the confidence to make it sooner.

Jennifer Richardson Book Cover

JENNIFER RICHARDSON is the author of Americashire: A Field Guide to a Marriage, the 2013 Indie Reader Discovery Award winner for travel writing. The memoir chronicles her decision to give up city life for the bucolic pleasures of the British countryside whilst debating the merits of motherhood. Americashire is out now from She Writes Press, and you can find Jennifer online at:

  • Website: www.americashire.com
  • Facebook:
  • Twitter: @BaronessBarren
  • Goodreads:
  • Pinterest:

SONIA MARSH SAYS: Throughout your story, I sensed your “gutsy” side to be left alone and not influenced by what others may say or think. Interesting how your MS diagnosis strengthened your decision to not have a baby despite what the doctor said.

***

MARK YOUR CALENDAR FOR THE SPECIAL EVENT TO LAUNCH OF OUR FIRST “My Gutsy Story®” ANTHOLOGY, ON SEPTEMBER 26TH, 2013, IN ORANGE COUNTY, CALIFORNIA. Click here for your invitation.

Do you have a “My Gutsy Story®” you’d like to share?

NOW is the time to submit your “My Gutsy Story®,” to be considered for our 2nd Anthology.  Please see guidelines below and contact Sonia Marsh at: sonia@soniamarsh.com for details.

You can find all the information, and our new sponsors on the “My Gutsy Story®” contest page. (VIDEO) Submission guidelines here

The Voting for your favorite June 2013 “My Gutsy Story®” starts on Thursday June 27th, and ends at midnight on July 10th PST. The winner will be announced on Thursday, July 11th.

You can read all 4 stories for the month of June 2013 start of Anthology #2

  1. Mary Hamer
  2. Dixie Diamanti
  3. Penelope James
  4. Jennifer Richardson

 

 

Gutsy Flip-Flops and Toenail Contests

June 20, 2013 by Sonia Marsh 2 Comments

8-100_1274
Sonia wearing her favorite flip-flops

Be Gutsy and join our summer flip-flops and painted toenail contest. Be different, daring and bold.

  • JOIN THE FLIP-FLOPS CONTEST and send your photos to: flipflopcontest@gmail.com
  • JOIN THE PAINTED TOE NAIL CONTEST and send your photos to: withoutaspare@gmail.com
  • You can double your chances to win and enter both

My blogger friend Bonnie Kassel suggested this great summer contest. You may remember reading her My Gutsy Story®, “Crossing the Sahara” in a VW Bug.

Bonnie's feet
Bonnie’s painted toe-nails
  • Sonia is judging photos sent to the “Bare Feet in Flip-Flops” contest. (Be different, daring and bold.)
  • Bonnie is judging photos sent to the “Bare Feet With Polished Toes” contest (Be different, daring and bold.)

Contest Dates:  June 20th-July3rd.
3 winners in each category:  Announced on my blog on Thursday, July 4th.
Send Flip-Flop photos to: flipflopcontest@gmail.com
Send Bare Feet with Polished Toes photos to: withoutaspare@gmail.com

PRIZES:

Top 3 winners in flip-flops category get a copy of  Sonia’s memoir: Freeways to Flip-Flops: A Family’s Year of Gutsy Living on a Tropical Island.

FFlipFlops-s Cover Small. 432x648

Top 3 winners in painted-toe nail category get a copy of Bonnie Kassel’s memoir: Without a Spare.

Bonnie Kassel Book Cover

BONUS PRIZE:  A pair of flip-flops and nail polish to the winner in each of the two categories.

 ***

MARK YOUR CALENDAR FOR THE SPECIAL EVENT TO LAUNCH OF OUR FIRST “My Gutsy Story®” ANTHOLOGY, ON SEPTEMBER 26TH, 2013, IN ORANGE COUNTY, CALIFORNIA. Click here for your invitation.

Do you have a “My Gutsy Story®” you’d like to share?

NOW is the time to submit your “My Gutsy Story®,” to be considered for our 2nd Anthology.  Please see guidelines below and contact Sonia Marsh at: sonia@soniamarsh.com for details.

You can find all the information, and our new sponsors on the “My Gutsy Story®” contest page. (VIDEO) Submission guidelines here

June 2013 “My Gutsy Story®” stories

  1. Mary Hamer’s 
  2. Dixie Diamanti
  3. Pennie James

Monday, June 24th, Jennifer Richardson

Polls open to vote for your favorite June “My Gutsy Story®” starts on June 27th- July 10th. Winner announced on July 11th.

“My Gutsy Story®” Penelope James

June 17, 2013 by Sonia Marsh 52 Comments

Penelope James

What Do You Do when the Good Times End?

             My advertising career started in London and ended in Mexico City in 1990 when my boss persuaded me to take early retirement. I heard “corporate takeover casualties,” but he was so smooth that for several minutes I didn’t understand that he meant “you’re fired.”

After I agreed, in exchange for a hefty sum, to resign, he asked, “What will you do next?”

“I’ll get rid of my high heels, give away my business suits, let my hair grow down to my waist—and strangle you with my pantyhose. Then, I’ll open a restaurant.” I’d been toying with this idea for a while. Just needed the money to get it going. With my severance package, marketing savvy, and cooking expertise, I knew it would be a success. Provide me with an income for life. At forty-six, I had high expectations.

Handling millions of dollars of other people’s money was easy compared to handling my own. There’d always been someone to go to the bank for me and help with my accounts and investments. Now I had to do them myself. Maybe I had a flutter of unease when I invested all of my money in this venture, took out loans and used credit cards up to the hilt, but I never expected I’d lose it all. My heart was not in this business; it was more like a romance on the rebound after the end of a long-time relationship.

The restaurant folded after a year, leaving me broke, rudderless, with no idea of where I was heading except, it seemed, downwards.

One morning a sudden urge woke me before dawn and I wrote the first chapter of a novel that would become my companion for nine years. I completed a full draft in four-and-a-half months, right before my fiftieth birthday. Set in both contemporary and 18th century Mexico, my book had two protagonists and two plots. Overambitious, perhaps, but it kept me going through loss of business, money, status, and my home of 16 years. Gave me a goal. By my mid-fifties I’d be a published author and over this economic hump.

Catering provided an income though not enough to keep up my former lifestyle. I sold half my belongings and moved to an apartment with a view of the Valley of Mexico. This inspired me to enter a world of mysticism, witches, brews, spells, and past life experiences that all became fodder for the book. I taught business English and catered events until one afternoon an earthquake rocked my building and sixteen trays of hors d’oeuvres slid off tables and smashed on the floor. Lost my best client, my income plunged, and I fell behind with the rent. My landlord agreed to take my living room furniture and most valuable painting in lieu of what I owed him.

I downscaled to a bungalow, former servants’ quarters, and plodded through a second draft. I wrote my frustrations, disappointments, fears into the pages, and the book became Gothic dark. An aching hip slowed me down.

A friend offered me a three-month housesitting job in Santa Fe, New Mexico with the bait that I’d have time to write. I ended up stranded, sleeping at her home between housesitting gigs until she turned unfriendly. Tried pet-sitting. A client asked would I sleep with his basset hound, meaning on the bed with me. A large, solid, tank-like dog that dribbled? My refusal didn’t bode well for my career as a pet-sitter.

My computer conked out, so I wrote the old-fashioned way, by hand. My protagonists faced significant obstacles as did I. A doctor diagnosed degeneration of my hip. I needed an operation. When? A year at most depending on my tolerance to pain.

My hip deteriorated; I couldn’t walk without a cane. I exchanged Santa Fe for life as an invalid in my son’s apartment in Tijuana, a city on the Mexican/US border. A doctor promised treatment to help regenerate cartilage. For eighteen months I believed I was making progress, even as the biting pain in my thigh grew worse. I wrote another two drafts of my book, a masterpiece of drama, supernatural happenings, and sex. Since I wasn’t getting any, it helped to write about it.

My mother died and left a life insurance that covered a hip replacement. Within weeks, I set out on a job search in San Diego. With no business contacts there, no car, no phone, and almost no money it meant, at fifty-six, trudging the streets looking for work instead of inhabiting an executive suite.

First I interviewed in ad agencies where I came face-to-face with young MBAs bristling with Internet knowhow and new marketing techniques. Next, want ads. Not computer savvy. Not qualified. Overqualified. A “We’re Hiring” banner offered a stopgap measure—a job as a phone researcher. $8 an hour. What a comedown, but the 1 to 9 p.m. shift was convenient for commuting across the border.

I became Susan—my first name – J. Whatever happened to Penelope who worked in solitary splendor in an elegant office? Now one of the hundred interviewers in the phone room, I sat in a cubicle wherever supervisors placed me. Another low-wage worker.

For four months I commuted four-and-a-half hours until I saved enough to move to the US. My new home was a hotel room. I wrote an eighth draft of my book. Gave my protagonists some happiness. They deserved it after all they had gone through.

Easy work, easy life. A two-year trap in a nothing job. An offer to work as a Hispanic research report writer put me back on track. In two weeks I made the same as in three months in the phone room. A new career beckoned. I could afford an apartment with a view of San Diego Bay. I shelved my book and started writing a riches-to-rags memoir.

Time to move on to the next stage in my life.

 ***

Please hop over to meet Pennie on Facebook and make sure you like her FB page  or join her on Twitter @Penelopemuses

 ***

PENELOPE JAMES: Anglo-Mexican-American. Born in England, moved to Mexico City at 10. Worked in advertising agencies in New York, London, and Mexico City and in Hispanic Research in US. Author of Don’t Hang Up! What Do You Do when the Good Times End? to be published this autumn. Co-writer of Barriers to Love, a memoir by Marina Peralta. Currently lives in San Diego, CA.

Former Spanish-English translator, copywriter, report writer, columnist “Insights into Mexico” for The Baja News. Has published nonfiction short stories. A judge for the San Diego Book Awards 2010 to date. Website: http://www.donthangupbook.com

 

SONIA MARSH SAYS: What a life you’ve had Pennie. I admire your courage and determination and can understand the frustrations you faced, and how you never gave up. Your passion for writing will pay off. I know how hard you’ve worked on your writing career.

***

Dixie Diamanti’s is the 2nd story in our “My Gutsy Story®” Anthology #2. Mary Hamer’s is the first one.

MARK YOUR CALENDAR FOR THE SPECIAL EVENT TO LAUNCH OF OUR FIRST “My Gutsy Story®” ANTHOLOGY, ON SEPTEMBER 26TH, 2013, IN ORANGE COUNTY, CALIFORNIA. Click here for your invitation.

Do you have a “My Gutsy Story®” you’d like to share?

NOW is the time to submit your “My Gutsy Story®,” to be considered for our 2nd Anthology.  Please see guidelines below and contact Sonia Marsh at: sonia@soniamarsh.com for details.

You can find all the information, and our new sponsors on the “My Gutsy Story®” contest page. (VIDEO) Submission guidelines here

 

 

The Best Way to Get Something Done is to Do it Yourself

June 13, 2013 by Sonia Marsh 5 Comments

 

3-100_1211
Friends of the Los Alamitos Library inviting me to speak on 6-9-13

It’s taken me many years to figure out that I can take charge of things myself.

Perhaps being a “mostly” stay-at-home mom when my kids were growing up, made me believe that others knew way more about how to ——— (you fill in the blank) than I did.

Seven years ago, I decided to write my memoir, and throughout the years, I’ve been learning new skills:

  • Social Media
  • Writing
  • Blogging
  • Starting my publishing company
  • Marketing
  • Book promotion
  • Publicist
  • Networking
  • Public Speaking
  • Event planning

I realize how much a person can do, if they try hard.

Gladys Ingle of the 13 BLACK CATS changes planes in mid-air

Now here’s one Gutsy Woman from 1924, who did something I could never do, even if I tried hard.

I know many writers, bloggers and authors who are working 60+ hours a week to achieve their goals, and I applaud them. I follow them daily on Gutsy Indie Publishers, on National Association of Memoir Writers, and on their own personal websites.

As a proud baby boomer, I’m amazed at how our generation keeps moving along, doing their best to keep learning new skills that seem so easy for my children’s generation. (A quick aside. Do you know how happy I am when I ask my twenty-something sons a social media question and they don’t know the answer and I do. YES!)

 Chris Guillebeau wrote about “The Challenge and the Opportunity.” What struck me as interesting was his comment:

“To me it seemed simple enough: something needs doing, I don’t see another way to do it, so I’ll just do it myself….I’ve had this attitude all my life, and it’s helped me accomplish a lot of things. Whenever I wanted something done, I’d find a way to make it happen.”

But what happens when you get too busy, or you just can’t figure things out yourself?

As Chris points out, everyone has strengths and weaknesses, and there comes a time when you have to question your abilities. Are you wasting your time trying to figure out something that someone else can do better than you?

I know what I enjoy, and what I’m good at, but I also know what doesn’t interest me, and what would take me years to learn. Those are the tasks I delegate to others. Three good examples are:

  • hiring a tech guy like Jay Donovan to fix my website problems
  • hiring a professional company 1106 Design to design and format my book(s)
  • hiring a copy editor like Eve Gumpel to go through my manuscript

In my case, I try to do as much as I can myself, and once I understand my limitations, I ask for help. What about you? Do you struggle with trying to do everything yourself?

***

 Next post Monday June 17th. “My Gutsy Story®” by Penelope James.

MARK YOUR CALENDAR FOR THE SPECIAL EVENT TO LAUNCH OF OUR FIRST “My Gutsy Story®” ANTHOLOGY, ON SEPTEMBER 26TH, 2013, IN ORANGE COUNTY, CALIFORNIA. Click here for your invitation.

Do you have a “My Gutsy Story®” you’d like to share?

NOW is the time to submit your “My Gutsy Story®.” Please see guidelines below and contact Sonia Marsh at: sonia@soniamarsh.com for details.

You can find all the information, and our new sponsors on the “My Gutsy Story®” contest page. (VIDEO) Submission guidelines here




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