The Guardianship Mission
“Sunny skies and fair weather today,” reported the Weather Channel app on my iPhone. Indeed, it was a beautiful day with the soft breeze wafting in salt air from the ocean less than a mile away. But today, my brother, three younger sisters and I barely noticed the lovely weather. We were on a mission. I squeezed our white sedan into the last downtown parking space available and chattering in nervous anticipation, we strode down the bustling city streets to arrive at the San Diego Family Claims courthouse. We had received a summons to appear in court per my petition to become the legal guardian of my four siblings who ranged in age from 15 to 19. At 21 I was just barely old enough to do so, and, despite having prepared this with my lawyer for several weeks, I was struggling to keep up an outwardly cool composure.
Standing in a huddle before the imposing, red brick building, I realized that for the past month, the five of us had wandered like sheep without shepherds, confused and bewildered. After years of living in a safe, secure, homeschooled environment, we suddenly found ourselves quite alone in the world. Our father had died in 2007 after a devastating battle with melanoma that had penetrated his brain, changing his personality and slowly robbing him of his memory. One year after our father died, our mother was diagnosed with colon cancer. Month by month we watched her painfully slip away. We had buried her besides Dad only a few weeks before. As the oldest, it was now time for me to step up to the plate and fill the role of head of our little household.
Taking a deep breath, I pulled open the heavy glass door and we walked in. Two security officers, each fully equipped with guns, a radio and a club were on hand to greet us, cheerfully confiscating our bags and dumping them into plastic bins, which were rolled down the conveyor belt into a security checking system.
In the lobby it was hot and crowded with people. An almost tangible presence of problems permeated the room. On a bench against the wall slumped a dejected lady with tangled gray hair, wearing a dirty pink dress. She sat motionless, holding her head in her hands. In one corner, a black man argued loudly with a city employee while in another corner, a haggard mother filled out paperwork with two small boys clinging to her skirt. It seemed that there were sad stories to be read in the eyes of the many troubled individuals we saw there.
We waited anxiously in a noisy hall until a sheriff opened the courtroom door with a flourish. The actual courtroom was quite small and every chair was soon filled as all awaited the appearance of the judge. A hush settled over the room; wisps of muted conversation rose and fell. A baby began to wail; the sheriff scowled. I sat rigidly in my seat, gripping the armrests with sweaty palms as waves of apprehension swept over me. Butterflies fluttered uncomfortably in my stomach. The courtroom officials were busy in their own familiar little world: the stenographer, with her tidy hair and efficient fingers set up her miniature typing machine; the bailiff in her police uniform, her hair coiled into a smooth bun, was quite pretty; the interpreter, an older, professional-looking Spanish woman, sifted through stacks of papers and gazed around the room with a sigh.
At last, the judge strode in, his long black robe flowing behind him. I watched him with uneasy curiosity as he organized his desk then called up the first case. He looked to be in his fifties and had a definitive air of authority about him. As each group stood to plead their case before him my apprehension deepened. He was neither kind, nor sympathetic. His responses were blunt and impartial, and most of the people went away rejected, rescheduled and frustrated. I quickly discovered that I was right about the sad stories; there was not a happy one among them. Bitterness, anger, even hatred was rife in their voices and gestures.
Standing before the judge was even more intimidating than I had expected. He carefully scrutinized my face as he listened to our lawyer justify my appeal. How grateful I was not to say anything! I would probably have choked up or scrambled my words as I usually do when I’m nervous. When the lawyer finished explaining our situation and pleading our case, the judge sat silent for a long moment. His response shocked everyone in the audience. My breath caught in my throat and stayed there as the judge praised our strength and courage in the face of our circumstances and complimented my siblings for their support and submission. I blushed beet red and my heart flip-flopped wildly. There was a profound hush in the room; even the baby had ceased to wail. “I grant your petition and I whole-heartedly wish you good fortune in your lives,” the judge finished. I breathed out a tremendous sigh of relief. With the eyes of everyone upon us, we walked out wreathed in smiles. Notwithstanding our calm and happy exterior, we were really skipping and dancing, singing and shouting in pure delight.
Walking back through the lobby I found that the aura of troubles and heartaches no longer seemed so oppressive. There were brighter and happier days ahead for the careworn people gathered here, just as I knew there would be for us. Leaving the courthouse, we were entering a new phase of our lives in which five, very young adults would be the supreme law-inventors and decision-makers in our childhood home. As we merrily crammed back into our little car, bubbling over with laughter and pride, we did not yet know of the lessons, hardships, sorrows and joys that were in the road ahead.
About Keren-Niccole Bunnell and her family:
My dad was a Lieutenant Commander in the Navy and my mom was a stay-at-home mom. She home schooled my four younger siblings and me all the way through high school. Unfortunately, my parents died within three years of each other after devastating battles with cancer. I became the legal guardian of my minor siblings at the age of 21 and now, two years later, the five of us are attending the same university together on full music scholarships.
Besides performing in Southern California as a string quintet, my three sisters, our little brother and I love to backpack and we have section hiked the Pacific Crest Trail from Mexico to the Anza Borrego desert. For the next four months we are training as a team to run in the Rock & Roll marathon which is held in San Diego (it will be our second marathon). In late spring, we will board an airplane for the very first time and tour the east coast, performing in concerts with our college choir and orchestra. The past two years have been a time of healing and growing together as a family and the future ahead is so exciting!
My website is: http://bunnellstrings.com/ and you can follow me on Facebook.
Sonia Marsh Says:
Like all who have read your story, I am in admiration of you and your family. Keren, you seem so mature, and after e-mailing back and forth, I am grateful that your parents raised an amazing daughter who took charge of her family after such tragedy. You are truly a hero. What a talented family you are, and thank you for taking care of your siblings at such a young age.
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Keren,
Having raised three sons, 24, 21, and almost 18, I am so impressed with you, and how you took care of your siblings. Your family is so musically talented, and I wish you all the best. You have to stay in touch with me.
Mrs. Marsh,
Thank you so much for the opportunity you gave me to post my story on your blog. I have been overwhelmed by the kind and caring comments I’ve received from so many people, some of whom I have never even met. It has been a great pleasure working with you and I am getting anxious to read your book!
What a living testament you are. Congratulations on all your fine choices! You and your siblings are wonders, you are, indeed wonderful, talented, kind and loving musicians and scholars.
Dear Keren and family,
Just wanted you to know how happy we are for you all and pray for you. I did not know the details about your parents before. The last time I saw your mom we met cart to cart in the commissary and stopped to say hi. She was so sweet. She gave no indication how bad she was feeling. God is so good, and I know he will continue to bless you all. Keep up the beautiful music, we miss you at Lighthouse when you are not there. So glad you can stay together.
What a story of courage, determination and above all – love!
Lady Fi recently posted..Enchanted
Your such a wonderful person and talented.you are a good person in your siblings.they are blessed they have you.
julia recently posted..Finding God In Our Everyday Lives
There is a deep, deep well of resiliency, faith and determination within your spirit, Keren, and within your family. I am inspired by your story…grateful that you shared it with us. Look forward to following you and your siblings on Facebook. Enjoy the journey set before you! We certainly will 🙂
Your story is beautifully written, with a lovely choice of words.
Well done for everything!
I love this gutsy story.. Actually, I have never read such great post as like this before.. Thanks anyway for the great share!
Kathryn recently posted..digial aerials colchester
As a mom to seven (almost eight), pregnant and hormonal, tis story made me cry. I am so sorry for your loss, and so fiercely proud of you and the lives you’ve embarked upon. I know your mom and dad would be so very very proud od you. Wish i could hug you for them.
I am so glad I started my morning by reading this story. In a world that seems to have lost its center, this story reaffirms that humans have an amazing ability to turn bad into good. This family’s will and commitment are heartwarming and important to know.
Bob Lowry/Satisfying Retirement recently posted..I Need Your Help: It’s Time For a New Satisfying Retirement Book
Bob,
I so agree with you, and when Keren e-mails me, she is so polite. Her e-mails remind me of how I was taught to write more formally when I attended school in Europe.
Truly inspiring! I’ve been in family court myself as a child and know how depressing and intimidating it can be. Your bond as a family is truly amazing and uplifting in every way, considering how this all came about. I am so happy to have read this and will follow you on facebook to know if you’ll be playing in Philadelphia when you come to the east coast. If so I will be there!
Barbara
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Keren,
Your parents must have been extraordinary people to raise a daughter like you. Your story is poignant, uplifting, and will strike a chord with anyone who values the importance of family. It can’t have been easy, but it sounds like you and your siblings, with your shared activities and successes, would make your parents very proud.
Penelope J. recently posted..Never Give Up on Your Dream
Thank you all for your sweet comments! It has been such an encouragement to feel support from so many people. I am now only the guardian of Ross, my youngest brother, who just turned 17. The five of us have learned to work together to figure out everything from insurance coverage to home repair issues, but we learn fast! (It only takes one day without water to learn that the water bill is due on the 15th!) Anyway, it has been exciting to be able to post my story and for my family and I to read your warmhearted comments. Thank you!
~ Keren
Keren,
What a heart rendering read…I was gripped by it to see what the outcome would be. And what a truly difficult set of circumstances, I felt for all of you. As I read, I was thinking “What a remarkable young woman. I wonder if she’ll ever get to go to University?” and blessedly, you answered this at the end, thus rounding off a lovely outcome. It is a shame such tragedy has brought you close, but I imagine that closeness and love existed in the first place.
All the best to you all.
Bex
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Your story is sad, and joyful and wonderfully written. I wish you happy travels and sunkist promises. Such courage and responsibility at such a young age is admirable. I hope the rest of the world sees what I see.
If the world of music fails to recognize your talent, you can always fall back on your writing-it is just excellent!
You are a strong woman. You have done what many fear to do. Your story is a real inspiration to me. Kudos:)
Debby Osten recently posted..kimkardashiantapenews.com
Dearest Keren, Very beautifully written from your heart! I remember the resolve in your heart when I came out to your mom’s memorial. I offered you freedom from that responsibility and you did not even take a moment to contemplate your own personal happiness. You have served your little family selflessly; exactly as your mom and dad would have wanted. I love you!
Thank you Keren for sharing “the rest of the story”…I always wondered how God had answered our prayers. Sounds like you are all very busy!
Dear Keren,
It has been amazing to watch you all grow up under the loving, committed and nurturing care of your amazing and selfless parents. They are so proud of you all as they look over the proverbial banister in heaven. Their efforts were not in vain. God bless you all as you continue to seek to glorify God with your lives. You will always be in the prayers of your Lighthouse family. Thanks for putting your experiences out their to give courage and hope to others!
It took a lot of guts for you to take on so much responsibility at such a young age. I am glad that everything worked out for you and your siblings. Thank you for sharing your wonderful story!
Siv Maria recently posted..First Loves
What a beautiful story. My 93 year old dad saw you and your sibilings on the Loma Linda University Seventh-Day Adventist church program today (Aug. 11, 2012) and was very impressed with you. I am so sorry to know you have lost both parents at such a young age but God is with you and will bless you as you continue to grow in him. My prayers are with you and your brother and sisters.
What a story of commitment,dedication, courage and love of music.
Hope you produce a DVD soon. Has to be a DVD since you are just as much fun to watch as to listen to.