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You are here: Home / Archives for frugal living

Should you give presents at this time of year?

December 20, 2010 by Sonia Marsh

Pine tree from Flickr

In December last year, I wrote about my challenges of buying gifts for my husband. 

Now, only a week away from Christmas, I’d like to talk about the concept of buying Christmas presents.
With only five days left before Christmas, I have nothing to give my three sons, 23, 20 and 16. Clothes don’t interest them, or perhaps I should say, they don’t seem to appreciate clothes the way most women would.Whenever, I ask, “What would you like for Christmas?” they say, “Nothing.”

A few weeks ago, my oldest son mentioned a Kindle. He then ended up using his birthday money from Grandma, and bought his own.

My middle son ordered his own present on e-bay with money he’s been saving since Kindergarten, (yes, he’s great at saving money from Grandpa and Grandma since birth.)

My youngest son says he wants nothing more than for us to allow him to enlist in the Army and attend West Point.  (I’m not going to touch this subject right now.)

I know I should be grateful they don’t ask for presents, and part of me likes to believe that our year of frugal living in Belize shifted their attitudes towards acquiring less, however, this does bring out the “guilt factor” of having a tree with nothing underneath it.

Mega-blogger, in terms of having 200,000 subscribers, Leo Babauta has a blog post on, “The Case Against Buying Christmas Presents,”
When I read Leo’s comment, “I don’t love Christmas shopping, or the over consumption, frenzied malls, consumer debt, environmental waste, wasted time wrapping, and over-accumulation of needless stuff that goes with it,” I could relate. As Leo says, “Giving is great, but buying is not the solution.”
I sense a shift in the overall tone and message of the world economy. With a 14 trillion dollar debt in the U.S., people will have to keep working until they’re 69, before social security kicks in. I wonder how long before the population realizes we cannot keep living a “pretend” life of over-consumerism, and recognize the need to live more frugally, the way Leo Babauta, advocates.
So this Christmas I shall bake, cook, have parties, listen to my boys, give them hugs when they want them, and perhaps, if they’re lucky, knit a scarf they can use in the cold weather of Michigan, and New Mexico. I shall also buy a black T-shirt from a blogger I admire: Annabel Candy, “GetintheHotspot,” and some beautiful postcards based on the nature photography of my blogger friend LadyFi in Sweden. Finally I shall give a gift of sight to a child through the Fred Hollows Foundation.

What are you doing for your family, friends and the world this Christmas?

Wants and Needs

May 15, 2009 by Sonia Marsh

“If they don’t have what you need, want what they have.”

This phrase became our motto in Belize. It was how we learned to live a life with less stuff, but more satisfaction. At first it didn’t sound right, but now I believe it.

I had the urge to write this post after reading Meredith Resnick’s great article, “Money complicated things, so spoil them.”

More is not better, often you need less to appreciate what you have. I’m not suggesting depriving your kids of the basics, I’m talking about the over-indulgence and the entitlement attitude of many in the developed world today. The two Russian girls that Meredith Resnick wrote about in her article felt overwhelmed and couldn’t fathom the need for so much stuff.

The only thing my three sons begged for when we returned to the U.S., was a glass of fresh milk. That’s how one year of powdered milk and our new motto, “If they don’t have what you need, want what they have, changed our kids. A big step in the right direction after “gimme, gimme, gimme,” and begging for a brand new truck, the year before we left. Their priorities, and ours, had changed.

 

The first time I strolled down the cereal aisle of my local U.S. supermarket, after a year in Belize, my head started spinning, and my knees felt weak. “Need help finding something?” a sales person asked. I looked at him and said, “There are too many choices. I don’t know which one to pick.” I could tell what he was thinking and stood there like a statue, way too long compared to the average shopper. The poor kid shrugged and left.

It’s a beautiful feeling when you, and your kids learn the difference between wants and needs.

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