Sonia Marsh - Gutsy Living

Life's too short to play it safe

What does your face say about you?

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Have you ever thought of what your face reveals to others based solely on your facial features?

What if there’s more to the structure of a face than we are aware of? Is it possible to learn some tips that can help us interact with family members, work colleagues, clients and friends?

What if you could figure out how to land a job or a business deal by studying the face of the person who is going to interview you before the meeting?

Could face reading help you with:

  • a problem child
  • a difficult spouse
  • a new relationship
  • a mother-in-law you can’t figure out
  • a boss you can’t handle
  • co-workers who are difficult to work with

Is there a way to improve our relationships with others, or learn who might not be a good fit for us based on what a face reveals?

Most of us may not be gifted in the art of face reading, so let me explain how I became interested in the topic and what it is.

I met Barbara Roberts, author of Face Reading: How to Know Anyone at a Glance, at The Inside Edge, a networking group at  the University of California, Irvine.  She has been on 50 National and local TV stations, including the Tyra Banks Show and NBC Nightly News. As Barbara explains in the quote from her website below, face reading is not new.

“Face Reading is an ancient psychological system of understanding a person’s character from his (or her) facial features. In looking at more than 6,000 faces in over 300 classes, Barbara has identified specific, psychological meanings for each facial feature. Abraham Lincoln chose his cabinet using this system. Aristotle hand-selected the generals for Alexander the Great by their lower-jaw structure. This approach honors all ethnic backgrounds, ages, and genders.”

Barbara claims that facial features fall into 3 categories:

1, What we’re born with, (high ears, narrow set eyes, etc.)

2. How we like to look, (changing our hair color)

3. Accidents, surgeries, orthodontia, and (plastic surgery falls into this category.)

Barbara decided to give the audience face reading based on two distinct facial features:

  • Forehead shape
  • Eyebrow shape

She asked us to pull back our hair so she could make a quick scan of the room and select a few who had those specific features.

Being Gutsy and curious, I pulled my hair back and practically pushed my forehead in front of her eyes so Barbara would pick me, and she did.

There were drawings of various shapes of foreheads on a card, some examples of drawing on Barbara’s website:

  • round
  • square
  • widow’s peak
  • wispy corners (tiny wisps of hair in the outer corners of the corners/forehead)

I have the widow’s peak forehead, which you can see on page 31 of Face Reading: How to Know Anyone at a Glance

So the psychological meaning for me was:

I like a relaxed lifestyle and to dress casually. That is very true, especially when I lived in Belize (photos taken by me in Belize). I don’t like to be told what to do, (True) and if I were single on a date, the widow’s peak is the type who says, “Let’s explore together what we want to do for our future.” (true for me.) I don’t like to waste time being superficial.

A few other facts, a round forehead means a people person, many long-term friendships, good relationships. Barbara mentioned if you’re applying for a loan, and you have a rounded forehead, show it.

A square forehead, means you’re career driven, work long hours at the office, focused. No time for a personal life.

We also looked at eyebrow shapes, for example, flat , straight eyebrows mean you’re shy and introverted, rounded eyebrows, “creates harmonious relationships, likes a peaceful home environment.”

Every facial feature is covered in the book in great detail, including Botox and plastic surgery, for those of you who might be skeptical.

So what do you think? If you’re having trouble with someone in your personal or professional life would you like Barbara to analyze that person’s face and help you learn how to handle their personality traits?

Her contact information is on her website. Photo of Barbara Roberts above, from her blog.

 

How to satisfy wanderlust from your couch

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I have two favorite places to sit in my house, what about you?

Mine are:

1) In front of my computer

2). In front of my TV

No, I’m not a lazy bum, but I admit that there are two things I love, other than my husband of course (although I don’t mean to call him a thing) and that’s:

  • The Internet
  • HGTV’s House Hunters International (preferably with a nice cold glass of Chardonnay.)

As far as the Internet, I’ve taken up way too much time discussing this whole social media thing lately, and just in case you need to make sure you don’t fit in the 6 % category, I urge you to check out Sandra’s step-by-step guide to overcoming digital overwhelm.

Anyway, coming back to my second favorite seat in my house: the one in front of my TV, this is where I could easily spend hours watching HGTV’s House Hunters International, but thankfully the Internet has saved me from becoming a TV addict.

What is House Hunter’s International? and what makes it so exciting?

If you’ve never heard of the program, here’s a brief synopsis:

“House Hunters globe trots from Sao Paolo to Prague. Home hunters and their real estate agents check out all sorts of architectural styles and work through the idiosyncrasies of buying real estate in other countries. In any language, home buying is an emotional experience.“

My explanation of why I love this show is simple; it’s about wanderlust with a twist.

“Wanderlust is a strong desire for or impulse to wander or travel and explore the world”

What better way to escape our depressing economy and job market than through “pretending” that we’re on vacation looking at potential homes to buy. Not surprising, the number of viewers has been growing with an average of about 1.37 million viewers between Sept. 28, 2009, and Sept 7, 2010, and here are some reasons why I believe more people are flocking to this show.

  • we want to escape our busy life
  • we dream of a vacation home
  • we’re nosy
  • we like to snoop around the inside of people’s homes
  • we like to see how houses are furnished in other parts of the world
  • we want to immerse ourselves in another culture, architecture, and way of life
  • we want to see what houses cost in other parts of the world
  • we want a good deal in a foreign country
  • we want to taste new foods, meet new people, see new environments and learn from others
  • we get bored in one place and crave adventure (that’s me and my Gutsy side)
  • we’re looking for another place we could move to (now that’s my real reason for watching House Hunters International)

The other night I watched several back to back episodes of HGTV’s House Hunters International. The one that interested me the most was a couple from Washington DC, who were looking for a house in Botswana. Now I have a blogger friend, Lauri Kubuitsile,  who is a prolific author living in Botswana. I was so excited to see her country and had no clue how beautiful Botswana truly is. Do you really have zebras strolling in your back yard?

Gabarone is the capital with a population of around 186,000.  The American husband on the show was offered a teaching job at the University in Gabarone and I turned towards my husband and said, “Duke, couldn’t you get a job teaching business or law there? Perhaps I could teach French in a school in Gabarone.” He didn’t seem too keen.

The three homes they showed in Botswana were gorgeous. It could have been southern California, as far as the vegetation and the outdoor swimming pools, as well as the price tag for renting which shocked me: $1,800- $2,200/month. Then I thought, “Perhaps the teaching jobs pay well at the University.” A little disappointed, I did expect rent to be much lower but often I’m surprised by house prices and the rent they’re asking on these shows. For example, $5,800 in Budapest. All I can say is I have a feeling they inflate the prices for the show. I know for a fact that the price of condos and houses on Ambergris Caye, Belize, where my family lived for a year, are much higher on the HGTV show than when you actually go there, rent a cheap (hut) and become familiar with the island and the local realtors.

I did a search on HGTV for an episode on Belize, and found one video which I think you will enjoy as it shows why so many seek a second place to escape their work life. A stressed out woman from San Diego wants a second home on Ambergris Caye. She wants to unplug from her busy life in the U.S. This video made me want to move back to savor our slower-paced life on Ambergris Caye, where we lived in 2004-2005.

Do you have wanderlust? In what way? Is there a particular country or place you’d like to move to, have a second home or anything else you’d like to share?

 Photo credit above (Tambako the Jaguar)

How to become a leader in your field

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We all have a desire to be successful at what we do, whether it’s professional, personal or simply making the best of the 24 hours we have been given each day.

In these times of uncertainty we have many questions:

  • How can we achieve our goals?
  • How can we take charge and change things for the better?
  • Where is our world heading?

If you are willing to think unconventionally from a business perspective, you can apply there tools to your own personal growth.

The following article “5 ways to fuel leadership in your organization” was written for business leaders, however I think it applies equally to those of us who are self-employed, have goals to publish our work, or start a business.

So what is the one thing we all need to succeed?

Leadership.

Not just old-fashioned leadership but, bold, gutsy and ambitious leadership.

Now if you’re doing it alone, just like a large business, you must take action and align yourself with other people who are willing to shake things up. A quote from “5 ways to fuel leadership in your organization.”

“Leadership is a bold, confident and deliberate choice you make because you want to add value and make a difference. Take note, the organisations filled with gutsy, bold and confident leaders, those willing to shake things up and charge the hill, will find that the field is uncrowded. Success belongs to those organisations willing to invest in leadership.”  

I believe the 5 ways to develop leadership within a company apply equally to us as individuals.

1. Choose to think big and act bold

You need to take charge, connect with others who can help move your small business, publishing goals, or your future in the right direction. Always try to do your best, and don’t allow others to stop you.

2. Define a big, inspiring cause

Perhaps you already have a cause that you’re helping with, and this is fueling you to gain more personal satisfaction with your work. I wrote a previous article on “How Can I Turn My Passion into a job” with Alissa Everett, whom I shall be interviewing shortly about her profession as a photographer, and the non-profit she created: Care Through Action,  as a way to contribute and make a difference to our world.

3. Choose to be Gutsy

Just like a large corporation needs to make tough decisions and focus forward, ask yourself:

  • What can I do?
  • Where do I want to head?
  • What do I want to achieve?

4. Celebrate people and projects

Celebrate others and show and tell the ways they are doing this by starting a “Brag Blog.” Success breeds success.

5. Lighten up and start having fun

Just as many companies have become way too serious, so have people. Kevin and Jackie Freiburg state:

“We’ve lost our passion for balancing work and fun… Fun is a major form of differentiation; fun creates energy, stimulates creativity and boosts productivity! Fun makes doing even mundane tasks more pleasant. When people are having fun at work, it’s like adding fuel to a fire.”

One example of someone who decided to become a leader and take charge of her writing career is Amanda Hocking, one of the most successful self-published, indie authors in recent history, who was offered a $2 million book deal. You can read her a summary of  her publishing goals in this blog interview.

For my writer friends, I asked Jerry Simmons some specific questions about book marketing, e-books, self-publishing and distribution. He has answered my questions in his newsletter WriterReaders newsletter, which I subscribe to and recommend to all writers.

Jerry Simmons

 

Do you feel the uncertain times we live in today are affecting your outlook on the future? In what way?

Photo Credit Above Sergio Castro

Social media addicts take worlidays

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I admit I’m an addict, a middle-aged social media addict. How do I know? Because of two things I did while on vacation last week with my husband and youngest son.

Our 25th Wedding Anniversary
  1. It’s our 25th wedding Anniversary and we’re checking into a nice hotel on Pensacola beach, Florida. The first thing I ask before we get our room key is, “What’s your Internet access code?” Then I start thinking, perhaps we can order a bottle of champagne and say cheers in front of our laptops. The good news is my husband is an addict too, but not the BA kind (blogging addict), no he’s an FA (forum addict) the kind where people discuss cameras.
  2. My husband finds a great restaurant within walking distance from our hotel to celebrate our Anniversary. He’s dressed and ready to go and I say, “Let me just finish commenting on this friend’s blog and then we can go.” Is that sad or what?

Now that I’m back home, with no excuses to not get back in the swing of posting, I discovered this article, “Scrap holidays, bring on the ‘worliday’,” which made me realize that perhaps I should quit criticizing social media, and those who participate in it, and simply accept that, old-fashioned holidays are gone forever, and we now have to call them  “worlidays.”  Lucy Kellaway of the Financial Times, invented this word. Another term is the “workation.”

“Worliday is a bit like holiday and a bit like work. It’s the future for most professional workers – and actually, contrary to what most people would have you believe, worliday is really rather nice.” says Lucy Kellaway.

I think most of us are programmed to believe that vacations are about de-stressing and spending time with family, not checking our FaceBook, Tweets, or whatever else we do.  Some experts believe we cannot recharge our batteries unless we “disconnect,” completely from work.

But Kellaway brings up a great point by claiming that we don’t:

” always respond well to a sudden cold-turkey immersion in idleness with the family in a strange place.”

I feel better after reading her article where she points out that prior to Internet days, it would take a good week to “unwind,” and relax and stop worrying about work. Since most Americans take a week or less off, I guess they never have enough time to “unwind.”

Benefits of taking worlidays

  • There is no stark transition between work and holiday
  • You can get away more often, since you’re still (sort of) working

Obviously this  more flexible system may not work for professionals with fixed holidays and hours, however, certain companies like Netflix, allow their employees to go on vacation when they feel like taking one- no-one keeps records.

So are the good old-fashioned board game days of family vacations gone forever?

I think so.  When people sunbathe with their i-phones and eat breakfast with their laptops and tablets, perhaps the newspaper is the only thing left of the good old days.

Are you in favor of worlidays or the traditional pre-Internet holiday?

Are you capable of a complete disconnect? If so what is your maximum time to stay away from the Internet?

Worliday man Photo credit

9 things you don’t know about me (on vacation)

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Are you the same person when you’re on vacation as you are at home or are your more Gutsy?

Do you try new things like:

  • Parasailing
  • Bungee jumping
  • Sky diving
  • Helicopter rides
  • Wave runners
  • Snorkeling
  • New foods
  • New drinks
  • Dancing at local night spots
  • Meeting new people
  • Morphing into a crazy, wild person

 

Here are 9 things you don’t know about me when I’m on vacation.

1. I let my hair go wild and curly: its natural state.

2. I love to dance. My husband and I lucked out with the Bag of Donuts, and  The Molly Ringwalds, 80’s music. Pensecola Beach has live music everywhere, and my poor ears are not used to loud nightclubs. I shall remain deaf for weeks.

 

Bag of Donuts
 

3. I drink and eat a little more while on vacation. Pensecola’s specialty drink is called: The Bushwacher. It tastes like a vanilla shake with Kahlua and rum: a great smoothie for hot weather and dancing.

Sonia and Duke at Peg Leg Pete's

4. I try to workout a couple of times at the hotel gym, and am happy when the equipment is in good condition. 

5. I love to walk along the beach at sunrise, with my first cup of coffee. 

Sonia walking on Pensecola Beach

6. I bring my own ground coffee fom Peets to our hotel room, as well as cashews, almonds and cookies from Trader Joe’s for the flights since they no longer offer meals.

 

Hush puppies sweet donut rolls served with dinner

 

7. I hate sunbathing. Many of my European friends can sit for hours in the sun. As long as I’m swimming, walking or doing something other than sunbathing, I prefer to be outdoors.

8. I enjoy talking to people and making new friends. I met Nancy, the jewelry lady from our hotel, and we shared our travel stories. My husband enjoys reading for hours, and like most women, I have to talk.

Sonia and Duke on Snorkeling/Sailing boat trip

9. I try to do something different every day. Either an activity like snorkeling or parasailing, or visiting  local sites.

 

We had a wonderful time sailing and snorkeling with Captain Jim and his wife Cindy. You can check out their Jolly Sailing website with photos. 

Cannon at Fort Pickens

We visited Fort Pickens, the largest of four forts built to defend Pensecola Bay and its navy yard. Built in 1829 and completed in 1834 by African-American slave labor. Fort Pickens was named after Revolutionary War hero General Andrew Pickens.

 

 What about you? Please share 1-9 things about you when you’re on vacation.

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