What do you give your husband after 23 years of marriage?
It seemed so easy when we first got married, but as time goes by, I know what he doesn’t care for, and those are exactly the things I enjoy giving him.
Clothes such as nice jeans, shirts to wear when we go out to friends or for a nice dinner, ties for work, or even new shoes.
I think many husbands become stubborn as they age. They get stuck in their old ways and won’t “modernize” their look. Take gym shorts, my husband has been wearing the same four pairs of gym shorts for the past eight years. He likes them because they’re soft, and they stop above the knee. The problem is they’re so worn, and look old and tired. Last year I bought him some new shorts which he told me to return as, “My old ones are just fine.”
No, this is not my husband but you get the picture.
Most things my husband enjoys, he buys for himself. Stuff on e-bay, like camera parts, for the movie he’s working on every spare second he has. I never seem to find the right component he needs, so I’ve given up.
Last year was hilarious, we ended up buying each other the exact same gift: A Garmin GPS. The only difference was that I bought the better GPS, so we ended up returning his gift, and now we’re both sharing mine.
I just read an article on the Five Gifts That Never Fail. Do you agree with that list?
#2. JC Crew
#3. Magazine Subscriptions
#4. Of the month club (for example, where flowers or a pack of coffee is delivered to you once a month, throughout the year.)
What is your favorite gift to give, and what about to receive?
Since I just came home from shopping I consider myself sort of an expert on this-NOT! Doc is always the hardest for me to buy for…like your husband, when he wants something he buys it. When I asked my son this morning what he wanted he said he is building a computer and there were some parts he needed. I just laughed. Of the "five gifts" I vote for fudge (or anything chocolate).
A Fitness Minute with Pat Anderson says
It is always a challenge to come up with a surprise gift for your husband. Last year I decided to give my husband a homemade Christmas gift. I got together some construction paper and cut out 12 large hearts. On the first one, I wrote "On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me a romantic candle lit dinner". And I came up with 11 other VERY romantic ideas for the rest of the 12 days of Christmas, on each of the remaining hearts. I gift wrapped each heart in a separate package and put them under the tree. My husband said it was the nicest present anyone ever gave him. Just a suggestion…. Sometimes the best gifts are the ones that don't cost a thing.
I gave my hubby a magazine sub. once, and it came on well. But I usually get some kind of clothing item… not very creative, I know, but he a guy that "has it all" too!
Sonia, you hit the nail on the head, for sure. Tom has to be the hardest person to shop for. Like Duke, He's happy with something that is nearly thread bare–but still functional[barely].Tom says that the fabric is nice and soft. Yeah, after 10 years, it should be!
So, I buy him cans of Royal Red wild Alaska salmon and other healthy type things I know he'll eat.
I'm easy to shop for, since I love books, and Tommy Bahama fragrances.
I get more satisfaction out of shopping for others.
Elizabeth Bradley says
I'm buying my husband a Kindle this year, he bought me one last year.
I like to buy people gifts, except for teenagers, they are too hard so I resort to giftcards, then they can pick out what they want.
My husband and I don't exchange Christmas gifts. Our interests are too particular. And I never buy him clothes. It's just not worth it. And on top of all this, I hate shopping.
Renie Burghardt says
Hmmm, well, since I don't have a husband to shop for (thank goodness!) shopping isn't too hard. My 20 year old granddaughter will get a gift card to her favorite store, as will my 13 year old granddaughter. The ten year old, well, I'm still thinking about her gift. My two sons and daughter will get books and some clothes, ditto for my best friend, who loves new clothes. Probably a pretty new sweater. The dogs will get a new stuffed toy and the cats–new catnip mice! Haha. Actually, my two sons and daughter think of me as the kid, and buy me all kinds of stuff, so I will have more presents to open than they!
Robert the Skeptic says
I have to plead guilty on this issue also, my wife has given up buying things for me for the same reasons – I get want I want for myself. Add to that our house is so full of "stuff" we don't want anything to add to it.
But nothing on the Five No-fail gifts does anything for me either, I don't wear pajamas and don't like fudge.
The best gift I can get is what the family calls a "universal gift certificate" (a check). It never fails to please and it's a cinch to wrap.
I am hard to buy for also so we usually end up giving each other something that we agree upon ahead of time and can enjoy together. It might be a trip, or a special weekend away or a piece of sports equipment that we can share.
That usually works for us.
I don't agree with that list at all! My husband usually ends up buying the TV games he wants and then I wrap them up and give them to him!! Otherwise, I end up having to take back the wrong thing…
I do always try to buy him a little surprise that he might like…
I love receiving books and earrings.
I found this all so interesting that, instead of replying, I'm going to do my own blog piece. I'll let you know when it's up.
Ann Victor says
Saw you on Twitter and realised that I haven't visited your blog for a while, so wandered over to say hi!
My husband has always been the most difficult person to buy presents for! And our anniversary is a week before Christmas which aggravates the situation.
This year (after years of me nagging) we've agreed not to cut down on presents and just spend quality time with each other, family and friends (particularly important this year as my husband's oldest friend is terminally ill and, sadly, since Wednesday past, in extremis)
(Win one of five unique prizes from South Africa in the Christmas Contest on my blog)
I found your blog via Shirley's channel..I think ( it's early here..I'm not awake yet ) Your story interested me..and the Env Sci degree …which my son is doing also….and the pull of living on a small island.
My hubby was wearing a jumper the other day which I knitted for him in 1981 ! Lol..it is VERY worn and bobbly !!This year I'm giving random people the " Twilight " video for Xmas…to introduce them to the wonderful series. Greetings from England 🙂
I laughed when I recognized this dilemma–especially when I looked at the picture of the man "shopping." My husband does not have to go to work in an office (partially retired/partially consultant who works at home), so he can wear his favorite cotton shirts which have no shape, sometimes have stains and holes, and which he regards as his dearest friends. Buying him new shirts only works if they are for public consumption or if they are as "good" as the ones currently falling apart.
He does enjoy opening something on Christmas morning, but he enjoys seeing others open their presents more. Special food items–gourmet peanuts, cashews, smoked salmon–have been hits. The Earon chair and noise-cancelling headset are the real Christmas presents–but only because he wanted and needed them close to the Christmas season.
Ballerina Girl says
I don't agree with that list at all, hahaha!
My husband is kinda easy really…there is always one or two little things that I know he will love, lucky me right?!
I like to receive really personal items…something that is really me. I guess I make it hard that way, but that's what I like!
I always give my husband a new pair of Pj's and a sweater so he has something to wear to church on Christmas Day and something warm to wear that night. We all know what they really want..(WINK) and thats free..I would rather not buy crap and save the money for the memories of a great vacation.
Donna M. Kohlstrom says
It's got to be a male genetic defect about the clothes thing! If I let my hubby, he'd probably wear the same thing every day. Sssh…don't tell him I secretly toss some of the things that are ratty and try to replace them with new ones of the same. Most of the time it works! Taking him clothes shopping requires tying him to the back bumper and dragging him to the store where he has a tantrum and tries to escape!
Meredith Resnick - The Writer's [Inner] Journey says
I love giving and receiving books. I'm just discovering cookbooks which naturally means I'd love to try to prepare some edible gifts, but something special, something beyond my Rice Krispie treats!
Daisy Soap Girl says
My favorite thing to give is a gift certificate. The things I love to receive are flannel pj's from the frugal or cashmere sweaters from the not so frugal.
My Three Sons says
I have a little story that I wanted to share with you. Last night my 14 year old son was sitting with me in the livingroom and he was looking at my blog. He was asking me questions about some of the wonderful blogs I follow and we got to yours.
Now I have an okay relationship with Coltan but he is a lot like me so we have a lot of conflicts so we end up at each others throats every now and them. He is also at the age where he is embarassed to be in public with his mother…..so I have gotten my feelings hurt on more than one occasion with his behaviour and words.
Back to your blog, he was reading out loud about this post and we were laughing and relating to some of our own relatives like that and then he came to the post about your son and how he made some mean spirited comments to you. He looked at me and I said see, us moms really do try to be the best and sometimes when you say mean things to me, even if you don't really mean it, it sticks with me and hurts. We ended up having a small talk over it and how sometimes you should think before you speak.
So today, our local Macy's had Santa and I asked the boys to go with Carson and I, and to my surprise, Coltan was the first in the car. Then he even took pictures with Carson and Santa and after that? He invited himself to Wal Mart with me and even walked beside me.
So I want you to know that with your son, I have experienced some sad, low moments with mine as well and I took your post as something positive with my son. Maybe it will only last a few days but hey, I'll take it.
I will pray that someday your son will have a similair situation where he will "get it" and realize what a wonderful mom you are.
Thanks for your honesty on your blog, I want you to know that it has made a personal difference in my life.
HUGS from a big fan of yours.
Sonia, PJ's aren't worn by my husband, ever! Too warm around here.
I usually get Tom wild Alaska salmon; healthy stuff he enjoys eating, like TLC bars.
I'm always on the lookout for thin cotton fabrics in pocket polo shirts. Tom doesn't like waffle weave shirts.
Old Navy usually gets the t-shirts in the spring–I'm doubling up on my purchase then.
Sonia, it's raining here in Naples–with t-storms, too.
Just popping in to say nice site.